Andaman Coast, Thailand, Part Two - It's Raining Ladyboys!

Part Two -During the Monsoon

The next morning I took a ferry from Phi Phi to Krabi, on the mainland, which was delayed by an hour due to rough seas. And the moment we docked in Krabi (and I do mean literally "the moment"), the rain once again began to beat mercilessly down upon our noggins and did not cease for the next 3 days!!!

I had booked a single room at the Baan To Guesthouse in Krabi Town, which ended up being a lovely choice. My room was refreshingly cool, crispy clean and most importantly...BUG-FREE! The sweet Thai proprietress of the place, Annie, called absolutely everyone "Darling!" and cooked up a mean Massaman Curry. Her husband-to-be, Peter, hailed from Sweden and wore clothes that were predominantly orange in color and reminded me of a prison uniform from one of my favorite all-time films, "Shawshank Redemption." There was another husband/wife team working there who happened to be tennis lovers so I was able to catch the Quarterfinal French Open Match between my beloved hottie and future husband, Rafael Nadal, and some other Spaniard I could care less about.


I did manage a wet & wild wander around the downtown of Krabi on that first evening and particularly enjoyed strolling through the night market. I purchased some sort of fresh fried pastry filled with coconut at the market as well as a plate of fresh mango with pretty-in-pink & true blue sticky rice (which I'm assuming had been achieved with food coloring). All that I purchased there was super YUMMY but I had a bit of an allergic reaction to something as my lower lip puffed up a là Angelina Jolie but admittedly not nearly as sexy.

Although it was continuously pissing down rain, I decided to go on an all-day masochistic JUNGLE excursion the next day. Our first stop was at a temple that was situated at the top of a mountain with 360 degree panoramic views of the lush countryside. To reach it, one only had to ascend 1287 steps. No biggie, hee hee. I was told it would probably take me 40 minutes to get to the top but I was able to do it in just over 20 minutes. About two-thirds of the way up, I was joined by the ugliest-looking mutt I have ever encountered. He had practically no fur on his body (Much like a Peruvian hairless dog!), plus a number of what-looked-like festering wounds as well as old scabs. The poor pup seemed harmless though and never once acted aggressive towards me so I came to enjoy its company as we, or rather I, huffed and puffed our way to the top. The only problem with my canine companion was the ungodly stench that emanated from him/her/it. I would catch a whiff every minute or so and nearly gag in response. Actually, now that I think about it, I don't think that any of the dogs I have seen in Southeast Asia thus far have been all that attractive. They are all short-haired, scrawny and stinky. Mind you, the cats haven't fared much better in the looks department. So many of them are painfully thin, with ribs protruding and look as if they have been on the losing end of more than a few backalley cat fights.


After the temple on the mount, we drove to some hot springs which were partially flooded. As a result, certain sections had been closed to tourists due to the danger of being swept away. We did manage to walk about 800 meters along a watery trail to an emerald pool, where a handful of people in our group stripped down to their swimsuits and had a toasty dip. Alas, I had forgotten to bring mine so was forced to wait under a pagoda sheltered from the rain for the group to finish bathing. Fortunately, I was kept well-entertained by the presence of 3 glamorously-attired Ladyboys in our midst. We're talking shimmering eye shadow & bright lipstick, a skintight leopard-print spandex dress (on one of them), a long strand of pearls (on another) and all in high heels!! I wouldn't have been so shocked at the way they were dressed if not for the fact that we were in the jungle in the middle of a bloody monsoon!!


I must say a word or two about our Jungle Tour guide, Tom. While we were having lunch in a restaurant at the hot springs (which, by the way, had oodles of big spiders spinning webs in its rafters), he snuck up behind one of the waitresses and barked like a dog at her, causing her to nearly jump out of her skin. It was hiLARious! And if my gaydar can be trusted, I believe he was a closeted ladyboy himself. His tendency towards making bitchy caustic remarks, engaging in over-the-top amusing gossip and tendency to sashay as he walked along were a bit of a giveaway.

The next day, the downpour continued, but during a brief midday lull, I opted to hop on a songthaew to the nearby resort town of Ao Nang, which has a lovely beach. Due to the ongoing monsoon, the waves were high enough to flood portions of the promenade so I had to exercise caution as I strolled along and keep a close eye on the waves as they approached shore. After having lunch, I hightailed it back to Krabi as I felt pretty much like a soggy noodle left in a bowl of soup gone cold. I needed to get out of my damp clothes pronto and plant myself under the blazing hot spray of a shower. Which is exactly what I did...


After 3 days of relentless raging rain, it was time to return to Bangkok, where I hoped to escape the dreary weather and be reunited with the sun. I once again traveled by overnight train from Surat Thani, but this time 1st Class Baby!! Sometimes folks, splurging on oneself is an absolute necessity...

Meow Note - A final word is in order on the subject of felines in Thailand. I couldn't help but notice first in Bangkok but then particularly on Ko Phi Phi, that most cats in Thailand have strange-looking tails. At first I thought, "Perhaps Thai cats are genetically pre-disposed to have short, clipped tails?" But I finally got up the nerve to ask a local woman why their tails are so strangely short and she said it was not down to genetics but rather aesthetics. Apparently Thai people think cats look more attractive this way so many of them have their cats' tails surgically altered. Poor pussies! I wonder if PETA is aware of this needless cruelty?